Monday, December 21, 2009

grief poem. written Sunday, December 6, 2009. 1 Month, 1 Day. 10:30pm. After driving past the cemetery. Originally posted on Facebook Monday, December 7, 2009 at 9:19pm

Trampled, crumpled, storm-tossed, torn
Wrenched and wrecked beyond repairing
Burnt and broken, pocked and pitted,
Shattered, crushed, beyond all caring
Ripped to shreds, gone rotten, rancid, ruined
Pincered, mutilated, splintered
Drowning, flailing, weeping, wailing
Smashed and scattered, smeared and smattered
Bruised, bewildered, battered, broken
Shrunken, shaken, overtaken
Avalanched and buried under,
Ambushed, waylaid, beaten down,
Shivering, shaking, broken and still breaking,
Waves and billows have surrounded
Me, and trapped me under, drowning
Weary, past caring, dried out, spent
Rent into pieces past all mending
Mortally wounded, yet not dying
Lost in the bleakest arctic winter
Lost in darkness neverending
The rack, the wheel, the bed of nails
Torturing, tearing, racking, rending
What's already rent--How can
My shattered bits still cling to life?
I cannot follow where he went
Feel widowed, who was never wife
Feel dead, yet still remain in life
I wander, wounded and bewildered
Like a homeless refugee
All is foreign yet familiar
And every light is dark to me
I walk unseeing, seeking succor
I cry out, but I cannot hear
Am I struck dumb? Blind, deaf, and numb--
Let every mirror now be shattered
The end, the end's already come
My life's been stopped, that was beginning
The battle's lost, that I was winning--
I cry for help, but cannot tell
If I've been heard or not; my ears
Can't hear, my eyes can't see;
Familiar paths are alien
And every road is dark to me.

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